halo.bungie.org

They're Random, Baby!

[MORE] Halo Movie Cynics Database
Are you afraid of what the entertainment industry will do to our beloved Halo storyline? Well, you're not alone but you know the saying, if you get lemons, make lemonade! So be a clueless movie executive and enter your most cynical movie cliche that would aim to 'expand the reach of the story' or 'make it more accessible to general audiences' or best of all 'get rid of the intricate stuff and keep the audience interested!' Channel the hack within you!

The Database is actually more than just a repository of cliches, it can be any description of a scene or screenplay snippet that robs the Halo storyline of its original intent. Johnson loses his cigar? There is a 'wise and all-knowing' Grunt in the movie that secretly helps the MC along? It's no longer Covenant vs. Earth, but Covenant vs. Federation of Planets-like union? Blasphemy!

We're not oblivious, we know the existing Halo material out there already has a good creamy layering of cliche, so we'll start with the premise that the existing storyline, as revealed in the two Halo games, the three novels, and the various bits of info disseminated over the years by Bungie, are the standard by which the rest is measured. We will judge and categorize each entry (e.g. tired expression, schmaltz, deus ex machina, over-the-top silliness, cut-to-the-chase, dramatic-pause, slow-motion, time travel, political correctness, love conquers all, fighting relatives, evil kids, beautiful babies, mother-in-law hot-seat, l33t speak, tear-jerker, "I was on my way to wort-wort-wort," etc.). Just give us the content and an appropriate title, we'll take care of the rest.


<<Halo Movie Cynics Database Home <<
bungie.org